Crazy Katniss
by icrybecauseotp
Summary: Short AU where the nightlock berries were faulty.


_Greetings to the final contestants of the seventy-fourth Hunger Games._

_The earlier revision has been revoked._

_Closer examination of the rule book has disclosed that only one winner may be allowed._

_Good luck,_

_and may the odds be ever in your favour._

I don't panic. I stare straight ahead, trying to convince myself that this is all a dream. I probably would have managed it if not for Peeta's grief stricken face, that he's tried to keep at bay. He looks like a child lost in the woods. Alone. Afraid.

And he slowly gets to his feet, looking me in the eye the whole time. It burns me. His hand reaches to his knife, and all I can feel is one hand holding the bow, the other the arrow, and my eyes on Peeta's, my bow on his heart.

His knife drops into the water and I drop my weapons. I take a step back. My face is burning in shame.

He just shakes his head, muttering, "No. Do it." As if I really would. No.

He picks up the bow and arrow, and the crazy thought of him shooting me instead comes into mind. I'm about to insist, though I know – deep down – that he would never do such a thing, he begins to unwrap the bandage at his leg, and without speaking, I immediately go to bandage it back up.

"You can't just _kill_ yourself!" I tell him, fumbling with the loose bandage.

"Katniss," He tries to speak softly. Tries to sooth me. "It's what I want." He assures me, but I roughly shake my head, whispering, "You can't" until the bandage is fully done up to the best of my abilities whilst he's standing.

"You're not leaving me here alone." I say, not wanting to think of what the future would consist of if he did. Would I be okay? Would I run to the safety of Gale? No. I'm stronger than that. Would he even take me back? Of course. It's Gale.

"Listen," He says, grabbing my arms as if to pull me to my feet absent-mindedly. But I don't listen. He talks about how he loves me, how life would be if I wasn't there to be with him. How he would have nobody to get back to. His voice is faint in my ears. Like a fly in your room, which you've slowly learnt to ignore.

I fumble with my pouch, and he eyes what I'm down, his words getting slower and quieter with every second. And then he stops speaking completely when he sees what's in my hand.

Nightlock.

"No. I won't let you." It's his immediate response, of course, but I hold his gaze.

"_Trust me._" My voice is hoarse. Like I've been screaming for hours on end.

"On the count of three?" I ask him, pouring the berries into his hand and then my own.

He gives me one last kiss. It's soft, gentle. A way of saying goodbye.

"One," I whisper, holding them out for them to see that we're not afraid. "Two," He continues for me, his voice shaky. I don't tremble. I don't twitch or fumble. I look down at the berries, mumbling, "Three."

And they're in my mouth.

I brace myself, fists clenched, knuckles white. Nothing happens. Peeta is perfectly still for a while, just like me.

And then he starts to choke.

_I'll be choking soon. I'll be just as dead as him. _

But that doesn't happen. He's still choking, grabbing his neck. It's silent.

And by the time I'm kneeling next to him on the ground, trying to get him to spit it out, he's dead.

And then the canon sounds.

And I'm dead too.

The hovercraft materialises above me, but I don't pay attention. I'm grabbing fistfuls of his jacket, willing for him to come back to me. The ladder is thrown down, but I pay no attention. At first I thought I was screaming. But I am whispering.

If this is what the gamemakers think is a sick joke, they sure are right.

Doctors come down. Peacekeepers too, I think. But I can't see properly through my tears. They take me away from him, and this time I really am screaming.

Everyone can see me.

Do I care?

Yes.

Do I want to care?

No.

I'm weak. They know. It's too late to go back.

All is lost.

I am broken.

* * *

You should review and stuff, yes pls. And also, everything belongs to the wonderful Suzanne Collins (aside from the slight plot change oops.)

And it doesn't go by the book. Some of the events do, but not completely. Hope you enjoyed it:)


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